I’m Allowed to be Creative!

The usual procrastination was setting in. I thought the Multi Media art classes had improved my artistic self-confidence and broken my inability to put something, anything, onto a blank canvas, board or piece of paper.

I now had a variety of materials. I now knew I was perfectly capable of creating. I now knew I just need to start, to just do it, to just let it happen. So why wasn’t I?

Something needed to happen!

All my art materials were kept in various cupboards. To create anything I would have to clear a space on my desk and find the materials. I needed to change this. If art and creativity were an important part of my life, the materials shouldn’t be hidden away.

I took all my work related paraphernalia off my desk and from the shelves above it. I took all the art materials out of the cupboards. Now I had a right mess! I gave the desk and shelves a really good clean, a fresh start. I gradually found the right places for all the art materials. I went looking around the house for my art books and put them on the shelves. I found a picture in a magazine with the quote “I’m allowed to be creative” and put it at eye level when seated at my desk. It felt really good, I couldn’t stop looking at my new art workstation.

But I still hadn’t put pen/paint/charcoal to paper/canvas/board!

I just didn’t know where to start. Then I realised it would be Mother’s Day in a few days time. I would paint my mum a card instead of buying one. As soon as I had this idea I knew what I wanted to paint. I had passed some beautiful tulips in the entrance of the supermarket, they caught my eye every time. I immediately went and bought two bunches, one of which I put in my daughter’s room.

I had something to paint.

My intention was to create something fairly abstract, a recognisable representation of the tulips. Once I started, I became completely absorbed. So when I finished I was most surprised to see a very detailed painting of two tulips. Although it wasn’t what I intended I really liked it. Most of all I was elated to have created something.

A very lovely pleasure as a result of this was that my daughter had seen what I was doing, she had gone to her room and created an amazing picture of the tulips I had put there, entirely in felt tip pen. She is 13 and used to be very creative, drawing all the time, but it had gradually dwindled to nothing. I had often suggested she did some drawing when she complained of being bored, but she always turned up her nose. I’m pleased to say that she has been filling notebooks with decorated words, doodles and drawings since her tulip picture.

The tulips were a turning point for us both.